Welcome to For the Glory, soldier! We are an intermediate roleplay about the anime/manga Attack on Titan (Shingeki no Kyojin). Our story begins soon after the battle for Trost, leaving our characters, worn, battered and distraught. The popular district is currently overrun with titans, leaving it useless for any sort of cause that could aid in humanity’s fight. Those in the military are currently trying to devise a plan to take back Trost, and an operation will be put into place - that is, as soon as they acquire enough warm bodies to do so. Until then, they are in the midst of a hiatus, training as many cadets as possible to help them in carrying out their plan. The fight against the tyrannous beasts that rule over this world is as ruthless and relentless as ever, and it is up to you, soldier, to decide where our story will turn. Will humanity be able to retake Trost, or will it forever be in the merciless grasp of the titans? The answer is up to you.
Updates
4.9.2016 - Welcome to For the Glory! New updates will be posted soon! - MARCO
Events
4.13.2016 - FtG is now open! If anyone experiences any problems with the skin, coding or board layout, please let an admin know. Thank you for reading, and why not take a look around and pop in the chat box and say hi!
Admins
MARCO BOTT
- Admin
LEVI ACKERMAN
Admin -
JEAN KIRSTEIN
- Moderator
Awards
TO BE ANNOUNCED
- Best Female
TO BE ANNOUNCED
Best Male -
TO BE ANNOUNCED
- Best Couple
Meet your Maker
FOR THE GLORY was created by MARCO BOTT and LEVI ACKERMAN. The skin was created by Dorothia this includes the Board Mod, Navigation Bar, Chatbox Toggle and more. Thank you to kimset from RPG'D for the tabbed banner. Board Icons were found on Axialis. Pictures were found on Google, Zero-chan and any other graphic resource sites. Everything else ranging from applications to posts belongs to its respective member. Please message a staff member if we forgot to add you to the credits.
Sometimes, the orders from the Commander were always.. A bit strange. She didn't understand a lot of the things that he told them to do, but, his word was law in the Scout Regiment, so Petra wasn't about the be the one to question it, that was for certain. Usually, the faction of the Levi Squad stuck together and were as "thick as thieves," as some would say. Today, however, they were split up due to their last expedition resulting in some heavy losses - they had to make up for what they no longer had, so the Levi Squad would be acting as their own Squad Leaders for the day. Petra wasn't ever too excited to act as a leader for others, but she would do it when she had to, and she usually did a damn good job of it, as well.
As her and her team traveled on their horses, the heavy clouds overhead began to sprinkle droplets of water, and it soon became a downpour that was inescapable. She grabbed the back of her hood and brought it over the top of her head, but it wasn't as if it would do any good, as it was soaked through in a matter of moments. Oh well, it kind of gave her the illusion that it was helping in the slightest of ways, so she's stick to it. Previously, they had split up into smaller groups from Commander Irvin's orders, and not too long after that, the weather had turned sour on them. She guessed that all they could do was keep moving forward, since the signals were rendered essentially useless in these conditions.
They also had the opportunity to take the liberty to stop, but that meant losing the formation if the others were to keep on moving. In the distance, past the loud cracks of thunder, Petra could hear the cries of titans, but they weren't close enough yet to cause a real threat, so she decided not to worry about them. Petra assured that her "squad" would be perfectly fine as long as they continued what they were doing, but as she was in the middle of speaking, she heard one of them scream as though they had just see a ghost.
This, unfortunately, was much worse than any ghost.
There had been a titan directly in their path that had just faded into view, already bending downward to use its massive hand to grab one of the soldiers from atop their horses, but Petra was too quick to act.
"Split up! Go around!" She yelled just in time for her voice to not be covered up by a looming clap of thunder. "I'll take care of it!" Readying herself, she fired her wires into the creature's shoulder before it had a change to react, and with the use of her gear, the sped through the air and circled aroun the ten meter titan. Her blades at the ready, Petra's vision narrowed as she screamed in aggression toward the vicious - she absolutely hated these things, but then again, so did everyone else. Her blades sliced through the titan's nape with ease, the large body falling to the ground; it wouldn't be regenerating anytime soon, that was for damn sure. Her horse had stopped a few yards ahead, so with a quick jog, Petra was able to catch up with it and remount the stallion. The animal galloped at a quick rate, the speed allowing her to make it back to her squad.
"Is everyone alright?" The all responded with a few nods of their heads, though it was apparent they were scared shitless. That's right.. These guys were still new, weren't they? She didn't think this was their first expedition past wall Rose, but this was a bit of a risky one, it would seem. This mission focused more on simple recon mission, attempting to find a safe place in the area that could serve as a stronghold in a place where perhaps more answers could be discovered.
Not too long after, it seemed that they had come up upon the giant forest in Wall Maria. Petra was familiar with this area, so she wasn't too intimidated by it, although it was a little more frightening at night, she had to admit. They entered in through the main path that had been created by walking titans, their horses galloping away to get them through. Perhaps Irvin was waiting for the rain to subside and then they could try and find a safe place to set up camp for the night? It was nearing the evening now, wasn't it? It would make sense... Petra gave a few curt nods to herself, though due to the motions of the horses, no one would be able to point it out.
Her thoughts suddenly cascaded away to her other team mates, including her Captain. How were they fairing through all of this?
Levi stood beside his horse, looking out over the stretch of field they still needed to cover. This was wasting his precious time. This was punishment. He had "spoken out of turn" again in front of the higher ups and now he was being forced into an unfavorable position. He had specifically picked out the members of his squad. He had selected them with the care and attention that he put into his cleaning. He had left nothing to chance when he collected the individuals that would surround him on every mission.
Now he had this.
He barely turned his head as he considered the people behind him. They were either so fresh to being military, or from the Garrison and shoved out here because they were losing soldiers. Their last expedition had been worthless and cost them lives. Now they were trying to make up for those losses. They were trying to gain more now that they had that Titan brat. That had sparked something within those above him. It meant that Hange would be facing even more pressure to learn things about that shifter kid and the Titans in general. So, they were out here trying to figure out more of a pattern in hunting them down. This wasn't just about seeing how far outside Wall Rose they could push now.
Yes, reclaiming Wall Maria would be one of their objectives. That would be invaluable for those they left behind. It would mean livestock again, added crops and space. That would add so much to the value of life. But they would still be hiding behind the stones that towered over them like the monsters they were so intent on slaying. If there was a habit to learn, if there was a nest of some sort they could find within their accepted scouting range, that would be useful. The scientist and her team should be out here though. Right now, there were only a few squads being allowed out. There smaller groups were to try and protect them, to keep their numbers smaller so there was less attention paid to them.
That had already backfired. Gunther's team had already called for help. Just before the clouds above released the downpour they currently stood in, he had set off a flare. Levi had pushed the slackers behind him toward the danger. There had been two five meter, and one eight meter Titan that needed dealing with. Sadly for his usual teammate, he had suffered a loss. The few men on Gunther's team had frozen and gotten themselves killed. It had ended up being just the two of them taking down all three, efficient as always. After a short conversation and a cold stare, he had sent the other man to take the remainder of his haphazard team back to the wall. They were too shaken to be any good to the mission.
As the rain pelted down on them, soaking each soldier to the bone, Levi had led the men and women behind him to the remains of a few houses that had been found on a previous mission. Ordering them indoors to keep them out of his way, the captain stood guard, listening for a threat. Several thoughts raced through his mind. One of them was that this was pointless and an exercise in futility. They would accomplish nothing in this weather and this close to the coming night. The Titans wouldn't be active soon which was, in a way, a good thing. It would mean fewer of their soldiers would be eaten. That left him to wonder how the other three were doing.
Eld, Oruo, and Petra all had teams under them, trusted to lead due to their daily proximity to him. Their effectiveness as a team clearly meant that they would each be able to better the chances of entire small squads in general. That was a stupid assessment. Now that one team was out of commission and Levi was hiding his here, how were the others? If it had just been them, his team, he would have pressed on as ordered. This nuisances weren't worth the gear they wore. Not to him anyway. His sharp gaze snapped up as he heard the distant screams of titans. He could imagine the sounds of flares, of the gear as soldiers flew through the air, fighting to save their own lives.
That made his stomach drop. The first time he had been out in the rain like this he had lost something precious to him. He had been too slow to the scene, too slow to help. He could still see Isabel's head resting on the ground before him as he fell from his horse. He heard the thunderous cracking of bones as he watched Farlan being bitten in half. The rage he felt then flared through him, causing his fist to shake. He had lost them because he hadn't been good enough in those first few missions. He had lost them in a rain just like this. The raven haired man bowed his head as he fought back the harsh reaction he knew was bubbling just below the surface. He couldn't take the rain much anymore since that day. Sure, he would do what needed doing, always, but nothing needed to be done now.
He spared one last glance at the house his "team" was curled up in now. It was evening, the Titans would be resting soon enough. They would be safe here. Levi mounted his steed and needn't even nudge his heels to get the animal running. He had hand picked his squad with the utmost care. He chose those people for a reason and he was responsible for them. He was terrible at showing it, but he cared about these individuals. He wouldn't leave them out here without him near and able to lend a blade. He had been the difference between life and death before and failed. He was going to do his damn best not to fail these people.
The forest was big, but of course not impassable. Petra and her new team were winding their way through the unbelievably large trees, her chocolate eyes scanning the area with care. It was even darker underneath the canopy, but because of it, if there were any titans in here they would be safe due to their inability to move. It was strange how they kind of behaved like plants when it came to their energy source. It made her stomach twist uncomfortably - that just made those that had died in the jaws of the beasts that much more invalid.
After a session of nothing but the sound of hooves thudding against the soil, Petra and her makeshift squad made it to the other side of the rather large forest, and it gave the "leader" a sense of relief that caused her to let out a gentle sigh. Even though her vision was limited, she was able to make out a figure in the distance during a flash of lightning - it seemed to be a large structure that could act as some sort of shelter. She wasn't intending on stopping initially, but she figured that these conditions were simply too harsh not only for her, but for the newbies that were shitting bricks behind her. Petra remembered what it was like to be new in these expeditions, so she certainly wasn't being hard on them; in fact, she was empathetic of them more than they would probably believe.
Upon closer inspection, it came to be noted that this was what appeared to be some sort of farm house that had been left behind due to the fall of wall Maria. It was large and was accompanied by a barn not too far off, either - this was an incredible find! "Everyone, to that building!" She looked back as she advised the others what to, and needlessly said they didn't argue with her whatsoever. Whatever happened, they would be able to backtrack to the walls if things got too bad, so that was enough to give her comfort. Petra made sure she was the last one to enter the property, making sure that her under-wings were all headed towards the barn to set up their horses for the night. If they were lucky, the house still had some beds for them to sleep in, which would be more than welcomed. Riding horseback always gave Petra a bit of a crick in her lower back...
The horses now tied up, the soldiers sprinted across the ground to the house, the door opening with not much of a fight due to the absence of locks. With its placement, it was probably rare that the people living here saw anyone come out to their abode anyway. The elite opened the door and took the lead this time, wanting to be absolutely positive it would be okay for them all to let their guard down in this structure. From what it appeared, the ceiling was much too low to house even the smallest of titans, but that only accounted or the first floor - it looked as though there were at least two or three stories to the house from the outside. The house was a little banged up, but it was still... Functional. There was furniture, a kitchen that still had some canned food within it (as well as some items that were now rotted that had been let behind), and she used her best judgement to decide there was probably a well outside in the back for water. This was.. Quite an incredible find.
She had to let the others know! This could be the first step in them created a stronghold out here - with some work, this could be used to accommodate the entire regiment.
It took a few hours for the rain to finally taper off into a light drizzle, prohibiting adequate vision. "I know it's the middle of the night and you're all very tired, but..." She said to her squad after a brief assessment of the weather outside.
"I need you to go try and find anyone else that you can. Use some of the lanterns we found to try and locate another squad. Let them know that there is a safe place for them to rest. Remember, stay together and stay alert - you can do this." After she was stared at in a fit of disbelief as to why she was staying behind, her look became stern. "Most of the titans may be dormant at night, but that doesn't stop the abnormals. I have to be here to protect this house."
And with that, they were off, and she was left alone to stand watch outside.
The rain and his horse were quickly becoming the only noises he could here. The captain of the special operation squad listened to the steady pounding of hooves on the mud below. Rain drops added to the beat as they made a deafening plopping in his ears, as if trying to work through his hood to hit his skin. As if he weren't wet enough. His steed raced forward, doing its best to keep the pace smooth regardless of how unsure its footing it could become. Levi's mind quickly supplied the jolting feeling as his mount went sliding, blood and water making the ground too slick to stay upright. The small man gave a small jerk, trying to right himself needlessly.
Eyes that matched the dark clouds above snapped to the ground. There were no bodies, no blood. He took a deep breath and scowled at himself. That was the last thing he needed right now. His desire to have his past biting him in the ass now was absolutely nill. He tried to convince himself that he was over the trauma of losing his friends. He had no true coping mechanism other than shoving everything as far into the dark recesses of his mind as he could. That was no way to process his grief, but it didn't matter. He never learned how nor did he care to try and figure it out now. There were more important things to worry about.
Like making sure what happened then didn't happen now.
He and Gunther had been the squads to the west. Oruo had been the furthest east. If he aimed for him, he would surely find the other two first. In fact, he was the first to be found. Levi's brow furrowed as he watched horses barreling toward him. His gaze looked beyond the soldiers heading his way. There was nothing chasing them. Well, there was nothing chasing them now. Oruo was driving the new recruits forward, keeping an eye on them and the most skilled member of their team to the back to protect them. It was a smart move as he would be the quickest to action, the best man to keep them all alive. In that team anyway. The captain slowed, waiting for the small squad to get to him.
It was a short meeting, a quick conversation and quicker glances at the riderless horse traveling with them. He spared a thought for the few that he had left behind at the houses. It was an easy decision that the dark haired commander made, ordering Oruo and his team forward to gather with his team. In this weather, at this time, adding to their numbers wouldn't be do dangerous that he felt it necessary to order them all back to the wall now. Levi would regroup with them after he had found the others, and escort them back to safety. Once more, with certainty that there were three teams that would make it through the night, Levi resumed his search.
Eld was next to cross his path. There wasn't a single empty horse. There were three possible reasons for that. The hadn't come across any titans, Eld had been able to keep them all safe himself, or he had a fine batch of rookies with him that seemed to know how to handle himself. He would believe the second option since he had made Eld his second in command. The third was unreasonable since he didn't put any stock in people he didn't personally have a hand in training and vetting into the field. The first option seemed somewhat likely given the time of day and the weather. Well, regardless, they had been lucky. He offered Eld a single nod of respect which was more than most people ever got. Being that he was the only one thus far to keep his entire team other than him, he earned it.
Once more, the squad was sent off to find somewhere safe, be it with his own team, or back at the wall. With a small sigh, Levi looked up to the clouds, seeing them growing ever darker with the night. They were probably growing to a soft grey, much softer than that of his own eyes, but without the sun behind them, they just looked black. At least the rain was letting up. He closed his eyes and let the drops hit his skin, rolling back to drip down his neck. Four scout squads safe. One more to find.
The captain considered where he would best find Petra and her team. She was one to follow orders and the forest had been part of their route. He had a destination. Riding forward, the dark haired made his way around the forest rather than through it. He didn't have a torch to see through the dense shadows of the canopy, so the quicker route was not an option. It seemed to take forever to go around the forest, it was even worse when he heard the crunch of branches breaking and the cry of a titan. It was quickly followed by the screams of humans. His stomach dropped at the sound. He was faster in the air than on his horse. His steed would catch up with him later.
Levi gripped the triggers for his gear, using the nearest tree to hoist him upward and he went sailing through the night. He easily ignored the rain as his hood flew back. It wasn't long before he saw an abnormal Titan, six meters tall, giving chase to soldiers on horseback, lanterns in their hands. How odd. The lanterns weren't his concern right now. Keeping them alive was. Of course, the Titan was falling to the ground faster than the recruits could process what had just happened. He was like a flash of lightning flashing through the night, splattering blood across the ground and giving the night that eerie feel of his first mission. The recruits were shaken, uncertain now that they had come across a deviant to the monsters, one that would actually remain active in the night. It had been quick and he wasn't sure how many had been taken before he arrived.
What he did know was that their leader was missing. The young woman that always concerned herself in everyone else, the gentle blonde that wanted to make sure that her leader was as well taken care of as the rest of her team. He just made through the stammering and stuttering of one soldier that they had found a house, a safe haven just beyond the forest. But, the Titan had come from that direction so they weren't sure if it was still as they left it. Levi sent them on, telling them to go for the wall as his stallion cantered up to his side. He didn't bother to see them off as the usually stoic man hopped onto his faithful animal and went racing back the way the team had come.
He only slowed when the house came into view. It seemed in tact, but that didn't mean Petra was okay. As he neared the building, Levi hopped off his horse, looking for notable damage, anything to give him some sign of what to expect. While he knew the lack of any clue didn't mean something was wrong, each step dragged this feeling of fear closer to the surface. No, he couldn't think the worst. He and his friends hadn't been prepared, no matter how well they worked their gear. Petra Ral had been trained and he personally saw what she was capable of. She had proven herself worthy of his respect and a position on his team. Hers would not be the next head he stood over.
Petra. His voice was curt as he called out, as always, the unspoken order for her to stand at attention clear. It was his default tone with his team but that didn't stop him moving. It wasn't until he saw her small frame, wrapped in the green cloak and water darkened blonde hair that something in him eased. Well, if ever there was a time for her to connect with him, it was going to be now. Levi was learning that the rain washed away part of his wall and he never realized it before he was presented with this situation. He had never been separated from his team like this before and wouldn't allow for it again. His steps quickened, carrying him until he was able to reach out and touch his fellow soldier.
His jaw clenched as his hand brushed over her shoulder. He didn't stop there. He pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her no matter how wet and cold he was. She was alive, she was safe, and she was finally able to find out how much he cared no matter how distant he seemed. You weren't with your team, He said quietly, his grip on her tightening a little more. He didn't like this feeling, this fear that had caused him to relive past horrors. He would take this woman's ridiculous questions about hugs over that.
Even though her team had only just left, Petra felt as though she had been waiting here for hours already. The titans in the distant had become figures against the moonlight, but they were frozen in time, allowing them to be considered "safe" for the remainder of the night. It was growing late and she was tired, but she was prepared to stay up for as long as it took for the rest of them to get here. The young woman took in a deep breath, taking a walk over to the barn to check on the horses. Just as she had suspected, they were all doing just fine, and seemed to be very happy due to the fact that they were in an enclosed space, so tying them up wasn't necessary. Smiling, she pet all of them and made sure that they had food to eat, as well as a trough filled with water in case they got thirsty in the night. When she came to her own steed, she reached out and placed a loving kiss on the animal's nose, petting him with a sincere wave of adoration.
Petra.
What? Why was Levi calling her name?
She turned around on complete instinct, her chocolate eyes quickly peering outside the barn window to see a small figure not too far away. It was definitely her captain - she could tell just from the shadowy figure. Quickly and in a confused state, Petra walked from the barn and approached her leader, her posture stiff and respectful, just as it always was whenever she was summoned with his powerful command. He had started to walk towards her as well, but there was something... Off... About him. She couldn't figure out just what it was yet, but there was a feeling of desperation radiating off of him unlike anything that she had ever experienced coming from Levi.
His hand reached out, the palm touching her shoulder. Her heart's beating quickened considerably, her gaze becoming that of bewilderment - what.. What was Levi doing? Her body was tugged forward in a quick jolt causing her to make a small noise of surprise, but the next surprise she got was.. Beyond anything she ever thought. Levi's arms had wrapped around her torso and were grasping her body tightly, keeping her from escaping for anything.
You weren't with your team,
The hug tightened even more, becoming a wonderfully delightful vice grip that Petra never wanted to break free from. Her stomach was clenched tightly and her heart lurched into her throat - a strange response came in the form of tears building up in the lids of her eyes, trickling down her cheeks. This.. This was everything she had ever wanted. Why was she crying? It was probably because she was happy. Her arms reached up, wrapping around Levi's body, holding him the same way that he was doing to her.
"I'm sorry, sir." She whispered, taking to the spot she had come to like, resting her head near the connection of his neck and shoulder. She breathed in that same scent, though it was now mixed with sweat and rainwater, but it didn't bother her in the slightest. Petra was, honestly, on cloud nine, and she didn't want to come down for even a second. "I wanted to be certain this place was secure." Her gentle hands became fists in the Captain's shirt upon his back as her emotions proceeded to commence on their roller coaster ride, but she could feel the wind of it on her face and it gave her such a sense of freedom that she otherwise would have never had the joy of feeling.
"Are.. Are you okay?" She spoke without letting go of him in the slightest, hoping that he wasn't intending on pulling away just yet. She wanted to live in this moment of heaven for just.. Just a bit longer...
Levi had seen the confusion on the young soldier's face. He had known that he was throwing most of what he had trained everyone to see him as out the window. He was the unfeeling captain that could work through anything. He was a cold and calculating creature that didn't need relationships. He seemed to care for no one. In fact, that was rather the opposite, though perhaps a handful of people knew it. He was just terrible at showing it, terrible at processing it, and he was fine with that.
Right now though, those walls were down. Petra was allowed to see those cracks in his facade that he tried not to show anyone. His weaknesses could be the downfall of any number of people. That was unacceptable. It seemed, only at night, in the rain, away from the general populace was he allowed to give this singular person a peek behind the curtain. He tried to convince himself that this was okay. She was one person and she had asked for more of a connection from him. This was the best he had to offer for the moment. He wasn't sure how to give her better either.
He took a deep breath as she explained her absence. It had both been smart and a stupid move. She had sent out moronic soldiers with no proper training out on their own, leaving them to their own devices. She had taken the calculated risk that they would be fine on their own. It just so happened that their chances were less favorable than most would expect. It was also extremely lucky for them he had appeared when he did. Levi bowed his head slightly, pressing his nose to the fabric of her cloak. Beneath the rain, below the scent of the horses she had just been taking care of, there was a sweetness that clung to the verdant garment. It was Petra's natural scent that matched her personality.
The captain stiffened slightly at her inquiry, once more asking after his well being. He remained silent for a moment, considering how to answer her. Physically I am fine, He started, words muffled from his current position. Slowly his grip on her loosened and allowed her room to pull away. This was a good deal longer than the embrace she had impulsively given in his quarters the other night. She might get uncomfortable with this, but he wasn't fully prepared to let go until she backed away for the moment. Feeling her under his hands gave him a solid, tactile confirmation that she wasn't dead. Petra would return with him to fight another day.
Clearing his throat, the Ackerman tried to offer more. It would be like her to pry further anyway. I ... dislike the rain. So much for humanity's strongest soldier. You would think that falling water would be something he could enjoy, taking to using it to clean the outside of whatever he was calling "home" for the night. For a man that grew up in the Underground, rain was something truly special, just like the sun. It was an act of nature that he would never have experienced had he not agreed to Erwin's offer. Yet, there were such connections that his mind made with it now. Death, blood, an abundance of mud that could make him cringe. Individually, none of these things were the stuff of nightmares.
Levi had watched death take so many people. He had had blood splattered across his clothes, his face, been covered in it and not flinched. Mud was a nuisance, but unworthy of such a harsh reaction. Yet, all together produced a reaction from him that he was not proud of. He was even more bothered that he was allowing anyone to see this side of him just based on a damn memory. He breathed out slowly, trying to take control and regain his composure. He wanted to make sure that those haunting memories weren't coloring his expression when they did part and she was able to see his face. He wanted to be nothing else but the strong, impassable individual everyone saw him as.
She never thought she would get to see the day when Levi would be as open with her like this, holding her in his arms like she had always dreamed of him doing. This was the thing that haunted her so wonderfully in the depths of the late-night visions, and the warmth she felt was incredible, seeping through the soaked-through clothing. She swore that she could feel his usually strong body beginning to shake frailly, but she wasn't about to bring it up and damage his pride anymore than he felt he was already damaging it himself. Petra could sense that his grip on her was loosening, but she wasn't about to pull away until he decided that it would be time to break the contact between them. The soldier felt as though she could stay here for the rest of her life, let alone for the entirety of the night.
"That's okay," She whispered in a gentle tone in response to him saying that his fear was revolving around the rain. She didn't give a damn what the cause of his fear was, but she knew that she would always be there by his side in case he needed any sort of support. The hand that was gripping tightly at his shirt underneath his cloak removed itself to find a way up to the back of his head, gently running her fingers through his hair, the strands feeling as though they were raven feathers to the touch. Petra smiled, a few of her tears falling from her eyes and sinking into Levi's cloak to join in with the rainwater. "It's okay."
Levi was a broken man, which wasn't what he wanted to convey to anyone. Petra knew it, but the others could have been blind to his facade. She was keen on looking past the masks that people put up, which is what made her so personable - with her own emotions on her sleeve and her vast understanding of her own feelings, she was able to detect things that were out of place in the people she was used to being around. She wished that there were ways she could mend the cracks and bring together the trenches in Levi's mind, but there was only so much she could do, but she was aware of that. Whatever she could do to make his life better, to make him happier and to make him feel safe, then she would be more than willing to sacrifice just about anything.
"I'm happy you're safe." She suddenly said, her small sobs becoming evident now. She was just so damned happy. The hand on the back of her Captain's hand lead him downward so she could rest her chin atop it, which would give him a wonderful access to the sound of her heartbeat, though she wasn't too aware of it. She was simply happy to be where she was with her Captain in her arms.
With the man she was undoubtedly and hopelessly in love with.
Slowly, the tension in Levi's shoulders ebbed, finding that holding onto this stiffness wasn't worth it. There had been no further roars of the titans out in the night. There hadn't been a flare or cry from another human since he had intervened for Petra's squad. There was no call for his fight or flight response. There wasn't even call for him to be uncomfortable with the young woman in his arms. She wasn't asking questions, wasn't pestering him for answers he couldn't or wouldn't give. This was actually a very calm moment in the now silent night.
It was just her gentle voice trying to sooth him. It worked. He frowned at that. Being told that he was okay should not have made him feel as such. Yet, those quiet words and the warm hand running through his damp hair were doing much to push away the adrenaline and fear. Perhaps his nightmares would not be so terribly great tonight. Of course, that was saying he would be sleeping at all. He doubted that a great deal no matter where he ended up trying to warm himself after being in the cold for so long. They could get sick if they stood out here much longer.
The captain couldn't bring himself to disengage as she carefully guided him down so that she might rest her chin atop his head. This was a peculiar position and his frown deepened. Her heart beat against his ear, further assuring him that she was well. It also gave him the chance to hear her crying. For what? His brow furrowed and added to his almost angry look. He was far from that, but he was most certainly perplexed by his situation. He let his hands fall to rest lightly at her waist, uncertain for the moment what to do about this. He felt he should pull away as that was what he felt most comfortable doing.
Something kept him in that position though, wondering if this was what she needed to make certain he was fine, though that seemed to go without saying. Petra, why are you upset? He asked, breaking the silence that surrounded them. His question was as gentle as it got from him, neither a scolding remark, or demanding bark. It would probably be neutral at best by anyone else's standards. For some reason, he felt certain that the soldier pressed against him would understand and take it for what it was meant to be.
She might of said that she was pleased about his continued existence, but what would bring her to tears? Perhaps she still feared for the rest of their group. Petra was the one among them that would feel for the absent outwardly. We've lost far fewer than average. Majority of the soldiers will be returning to Trost come morning, He offered as a way to appease whatever ailed her. Was that even the right way to approach this? That might actually make it worse as there had been a couple of casualties among the various squads sent out tonight. He would deal with the repercussions of his words in a moment. He would also need to get them inside and warming up. Levi was very tempted about asking if there were additional clothes they could change into so they could dry their uniforms. He, for one, was not keen on catching cold for want of a dry set of his own clothes.
What had she done to deserve a wonderful spot in heaven such as this? She was wrecking her brain, trying to figure it out, but her efforts proved fruitless no matter how much she tried. Petra had this wonderful human being within her arms, and she didn't want to let go of him for the world, but she didn't hesitate to loosen her grip on him when he pulled away just to look at her. He was wondering why she was upset, but how was she supposed to convey that she wasn't upset in the slightest? She was so happy with everything at the current that she couldn't even begin to see straight. Petra was above any cloud nine that could have ever existed at this very moment, but she was having to force herself down in order to try and explain why tears were falling from her eyes effortlessly.
"I'm not sad, I'm actually happy." That must have sounded so weird to him, someone who wasn't used to emotions in the slightest. It was a little strange to think of the reasoning behind crying due to happiness. "I know it doesn't make any sense." His hands were resting upon her waist, goosebumps finding their way to manifest upon her skin due to the wonderful contact. How often had she dreamed about being in this very position, so close to her Captain like this? She smiled softly at his way of trying to console her, and even though that wasn't anywhere near the issue she was having, it was still appreciated that he was trying. It was absolutely precious, really.
Petra knew that this was her change - it was either now.. Or never. She knew that this was her one moment to actually get to where she prayed night after night with her respected Captain. She hoped that he wouldn't shun her after this - her stomach twisted in a discomforting way, but it was also because she was excited, nervous in the happiest of ways. Her hand remained in Levi's hair as she suddenly closed the distance between the two of them, the sides of their nose touching as their lips connected. It was.. Just was wonderful as Petra had always thought it would be. His lips were cold, but yet warm all at the same time - she could feel ever crease and crevice against her own mouth. She was afraid to pull back and see the damage she had just created between the two of them, but she was also curious as to how he would react to something like this.
Her hands started to tremble against him, her head slowly pulling back to allow a centimeter difference between their connection. How she wanted to just go right back into that wonderful sensation, but she knew that it would probably be best to hold off for the time being. He was probably confused beyond repair, but she would be there for him to hold his hand if he ever felt the need for that kind of support. Even if this was only a one-time thing, she would be okay with that.
She would be satisfied just being able to stand next to him.
Levi shouldn't have been surprised at the turn of events. He should have seen it coming. If he cared to look at his current situation, the signs had been there all along. He had even seen them. Levi Ackerman hadn't been raised to properly process emotion and be there for others in that capacity. He had been raised to survive. He was not an oblivious idiot though. At firs the thought it just infatuation, hero worship perhaps due to the fact that everyone else called him humanity's strongest. He didn't identify as such, but he couldn't stop anyone else from saying so without severely hurting several individuals.
Her growing crush was evident in her continued concern for him, expressing more interest in him than her teammates, or rather, more concern than anyone else. The other night when she found herself in front of his door should have been the sign that he needed to push her away as hard as he could. That impulsive hug should have meant that he berate her for such foolishness. He hadn't bothered since he didn't actually see this coming. He hadn't accounted for her bravery in the field turning into brazenness with him.
One moment he was looking at her, curious as to why her happiness led to tears. He had never been so overwhelmed with joy that it resulted in this reaction. Anger and grief had been the only emotions to truly spur him into rash actions. Petra Ral was a very different individual. This happiness coursing through her resulted in her lips pressed to his. There was a chill from the cool air and colder rain. Yet, there was such warmth radiating from her that he might have forgotten that they were soaked and likely to fall ill. His shoulders dropped a fraction, finding the affection from his teammate favorable in a fashion. It wasn't smart of them to get involved due to their profession and their positions. Had that ever stopped any of the others?
He closed his eyes, considering how terrible a choice she had made. Loving him was detrimental to her own health. His relationships did not end well. The longest running thus far was with Erwin. He was cold, and it didn't seem probable that he would be able to properly return her emotional investment. Unexpected as this was, it was inviting. The warmth, the softness. Petra's desire to care for him was endearing, though he couldn't fathom why she would choose him. The kiss broke and she barely backed away. She didn't leave much space between them, as if afraid to see what expression would be on his face. She was probably expecting anger. The impetuous hug had been one thing; a kiss raised the stakes a good deal higher.
Levi took a half step back, knowing that there was virtually nothing showing in his expression. He lifted a hand to take hers from his hair, the warmth immediately missed in the brisk night. We need to go inside. You're soaked. You'll catch cold, He said softly, uncertain what words should be said in such a situation as this. Her choice in partners was poor and he didn't know how to let her down. She deserved better than a criminal. Petra's kindness toward others and fierceness in defending what she believed in should earn her a partner that could match it well. His respect for her really should prevent him from allowing this to continue further. Unfortunately for them both, the only people he would confide in and expect advice from in matters such as this were dead. The only others he was close with were an insane scientist and a man nearly as cold as him.
Yeah, that was helpful.
Keeping her hand in his, he turned toward the house, curious as to what she and her squad had found within. His steps were slow, cautious though he trusted that she had made sure anyone occupant would be safe inside. As with cleaning, he would only agree after his own inspection. His list of priorities was simple. Secure the house, fire, then figure out what the hell to do with Ral.
Oh god, if she hadn't ever messed up big time before, this was certainly her time to shine in that department. She felt as though, for a moment, she had ruined absolutely everything that she felt she had with her Captain. The respect that she thought was mutual was probably abolished now because of her own stupid actions - she couldn't keep herself in check and now she would have to pay for it. Levi had pulled away and she hesitantly met his eyes, finding that they were just as dull as they usually were, but she could tell that something in him was indeed moved, like he was surprised but not in a horrible way. She praised to herself whatever was willing to listen to her claims of gratefulness and eagerly grabbed her leader's hand as he brought her inside of the house. His movements were slow and cautious, as though he was inspecting the place in great detail - that was just like him, after all.
The house that they had found was big, probably big enough to accommodate the entire Regiment with the amount of land that was incorporated in this piece of land. Quite easily they could erect a fence that would further protect this area - there was plenty of space for Erwin and the others to communicate with each other, her Captain included. Hell, she'd clean the whole damn place for him if that was what he wanted out of her. She hadn't gotten a chance to inspect the upstairs of the farmhouse, but she suspected that it was much like the bottom floor, perhaps even a bit nicer.
As soon as she stopped moving and the adrenaline was beginning to wear off, she could feel the chill of the rainwater making its way to the core of her very being. She gave a small shudder, immediately removing the heavy Scout Regiment cloak that hung heavily on her shoulders. She hadn't anticipated the rain... And the rest of her clothing was strapped onto her horse, she wasn't planning on going back out there again. Her wet hair stuck to the side of her face before she wiped away with a small noise of detest. She disliked the feeling of clothes clinging to her skin the way that they were currently - it always made her feel so.. Nasty.
Levi being in the room did bring her an amount of comfort that she was happy to have. without much thought, the young soldier began to search around for a heat stove, and she found one without much effort - there was still some wood in there, as well as an old, dusty pile ready for use sitting next to it. Thank goodness. Matches were also found nearby, and she was grateful that she wouldn't have to deal with ones completely soaked - the Scout scraped the magnesium against the friction, the spark igniting and creating a small flame that quickly took the dried, slightly burnt wood already in the stove. It crackled automatically and Petra held her hands out against the flame, her uniform still giving her an intense chill that she was desperately trying to shake off.
"Ahh.. Damn." She hissed to herself quietly, leaning in a little closer to the growing flame. This was awful.
As they entered the farmhouse, Levi let his fingers slip from Petra's. Suddenly, his walls were back up and he was on guard. He listened carefully for any sound that they didn't make. He glanced at his companion for the evening and nodded toward the stairs to signal that he was going up. For the moment he needed to trust that that she had done her job well earlier despite not bothering to find out what was upstairs. He would just have to do so which was fine with him. He preferred having the final say on things.
His steps were quiet as he ascended and watched for movement other than his own. Unsurprisingly, there wasn't another living soul here. There was one problem though. It was a mess. No, there weren't things strewn everywhere, signs of a hurried departure evident across the floor. It was dusty with disuse though. It curled his lip in disgust as he moved from room to room. It was awful here, but they had two choices - travel in the continuing rain, or remain here and wait until the storm passed. He wasn't keen on prolonged exposure to the elements and the ill feelings they conjured. He also didn't really want to stay in this filth, but it wasn't quite as distasteful. Downstairs hadn't been quite this bad so it might just be tolerable.
He might still be up most of the night cleaning just to make himself feel better. At least it looked like they might have dry garments to change into. Levi had wandered into what looked like a former bedroom. There were still clothes in the dresser drawers which managed to pass his inspection. They were passable just until their uniforms were dry. He gathered enough for the both of them and returned to the stair case. The captain made his way toward the room Petra was working in, having a fire going in the stove. Two goals down.
He moved to stand behind her, seeing that she had at least taken her cloak off and was trying to warm her hands. I've found clothes. It'll be easier for you to get warm if you change, He said, stepping to the side to set his prize down in a clean spot. Without another word, he took his own advise. The cloak and jacket were set out near the stove the metal warmed from the flames within. The jacket he was sure would be ready to go by morning, but the cloak was thicker so he had less hope to be able to wear that upon their return. He frowned at the verdant fabric and returned to his task.
His deft fingers loosened the straps of his gear which was set off to the corner. It clanked and clanged as it settled and was forgotten for the moment. He started to work on his shirt, frowning at the cool air that pressed against his skin. A chill ran down his spine and he stepped closer to the small stove. The warmth radiating from it was better, but not quite enough. As he said, they needed to change for the simple task of raising their body temperature would be easier. The formerly wrinkle free white shirt was deposited with his jacket. The raven haired male moved to the pile to pick out the shirts he had found. He extended his arm out, expecting the blonde to take the shirt he offered her without his further prompting.
Levi had come back down from the floor overhead, and although she heard few creaks and groans from the structure, she figured that the place was ultimately fortified and safe. What a relief that was... She might have gotten a bit off track by the end of her endeavor, but it did prove itself to be fruitful. He was handing her a pair of clothes that she hoped would fit her at least moderately well so she would be able to rest up for the evening. She understood if there wasn't enough space for her to have a bed for the evening, that was fine, just as long as she had a blanket she felt as though she could rest anywhere at this point. She was a bit dumbfounded, though, when she noticed that her Captain was beginning to.. Take off his clothes. Right in front of her.
She gulped visibly, though not audibly. She looked like a damn fool just standing there, gawking at him with a bewildered expression that expressed complete adoration. She hoped that he hadn't seen her staring at him like she was a blubbering, love-struck fool - even though.. She was.
Petra shook her head quickly to try and snap herself out of her own little fantasy world, taking the shirt that was offered to he with a swift movement. Truthfully, the last thing that she wanted to look like to her Captain was idiotic, and she was doing an absolutely wonderful job at conveying the one thing that she wanted to conceal. Unfortunately for her, she was so keen on wearing those emotions on her sleeve, no matter what they were and no matter the detrimental outcomes it might produce.
"Thank you, sir." She spoke quietly, a thick and deep flush covering her cheeks as she turned around, realizing that it would be her turn to get rid of the the gross pieces of fabric clinging to her skin. It was weird... She had never undressed with anyone else in the room. She took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself, and she began to rid herself of her gear, though she quickly realized that she had to remove the jacket first. God, how dumb could she get? This was going from bad to worse.
After removing the crop-top article of clothing, she then proceeded to undo the buttons of her white shirt, working her way downward, making sure that her back was turned to Levi as to not expose herself completely... Jeez... This was so nerve wrecking for her. But, she did have the admit that the flame felt so nice against the skin of her stomach; she allowed the long-sleeve shirt to slide off of her arms Before she began to remove her bra from the top half of her body, she leaned over and wrung out her hair against her wet shirt, letting the moisture from the strands soak into the fabric - she didn't have a towel, so she simply had to make do with what she had.
Even though her Captain was right behind her, she reached around her back and unhook the latches of her bra, feeling the straps suddenly become loose against her shoulders. Looking down at the fire was her only solace right now, the only thing that made her feel a little more at ease with this whole thing. At least she was doing this before all of them showed up... Come to think of it, she could have gone somewhere else to change, but that would have meant leaving the fire unattended and she couldn't have that - the flames were the only thing keeping her from shivering. Petra absolutely hated the cold, much more so than her lack of vanity.
The bra was easy to remove then, and she tossed it alongside her soaked shirt, thankful to have both of them off of her body. She took in a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. The fire.. Really did feel nice. She almost lost herself to the point where she forgot she had another piece of clothing to put on.
Levi never really considered how different he could be from others. In this moment, a small part of him forgot, or rather, didn't register that Petra might be opposed to disrobing in front of someone else. She might not like entertaining the idea of changing in front of a man, no less her captain. This moment was about their health and not much else. He had that ability to compartmentalize everything into what was necessary to function at any given time, and what needed to wait. Modesty was not among the things he considered important in the moment as they needed to warm themselves.
The soft "thank you, sir" drew his attention. His brow furrowed as he glanced at her while she turned her back on him and fumbled with her uniform. He looked away as he considered her shift in attitude. He was making her uncomfortable. She had resorted to being formal despite how very informal she had been outside. Why the change? Was the fact that they now had to disrobe in an effort to keep themselves well that bothersome to her? He was sure that she understood the importance of maintaining proper body temperature so they were able to function to their full capabilities. It had always been one of his top priorities growing up, well after Kenny abandoned him.
The biggest reason he was such a neat freak had always been to prevent sickness as those beneath Wall Sina were so prone to just that and dying from it. The lack of sunlight so greatly diminished their immune systems and their ability to remain healthy that it was so important that everything be as clean as physically possible. No one knew that was his reasoning for being so diligent and forcing people into going over the same thing three times. It didn't matter quite as much tonight since it would only be a few hours and the dust wasn't their biggest worry. The cold was going to be the bigger danger. he glanced at her once more, just in time to catch her trying to wring out her hair.
It didn't seem that much happened as she was using an equally drenched garment for her towel. Now that was just stupid. His deep grey eyes flicked down to the shirt still in his hand that was meant to go on his shoulders. There were more upstairs. Her hair was longer than his and needed to dry. The captain shifted forward, lifting the fabric so he could touch the top of her head as she faced the warmth of the stove. Carefully, so not to hurt her, he used the shirt to better wring the rain from her damp locks. This was not a task he would typically take on for another, but she seemed to need the help, fighting off the shivers as she stood as bare as he was.
Was he the forward one now? Of course not. He was tending to his comrade so their proximity wouldn't continue to discomfort her. Right? Perhaps he should learn their boundaries, or try to help determine where they lay. Petra seemed just as confused about them. I don't understand, Ral, He said in a low tone, his velvet voice breaking the silence. You hugged and kissed me impulsively. I take this to mean you want for a change in our relationship. He kept his gaze on his hands, mindful of what he was doing. He made sure his voice didn't show anything but careful neutrality, knowing that his tone could sound harsher than he sometimes intended. Right now, he was just trying to figure out what exactly she was trying to accomplish.
His fellow soldier knew that he wasn't exactly the best with the complications of relationships, or handling anyone's emotions(including his own), so this back and forth didn't help. You immediately turn to formalities after each. That can be taken as quite confusing. This was perhaps one of the few times he had spoken so much in front of her. So few got a full conversation out of him that he was almost sure that some might not think him capable of such a thing. Now Petra would have quite the story to tell the others if she wasn't too embarrassed to share. You said you wanted to understand me. I feel it fair to assume you would like me to understand you. If this is the way you act, then I'm surprised to say you might just have the easier task. Levi didn't think himself a hard person to grasp, but it was clear many disagreed. Petra was most certainly the easier person to understand. However, he didn't know how anyone could get a handle on her if she was always flipflopping like this.
She hadn't noticed that he was getting closer to her. She was lost in the sensation of the heat against her skin, the soft fabric in her hands that would soon be covering her shoulders - in a way she just wanted to stay like this so the fire could warm her up entirely. She would need to get her drenched pants off soon as well, though she wasn't sure if there were any pants or skirts here that would fit her. Just as her arms were about to move to clothe herself, a sudden sensation of something atop her head caused her to jolt upward and make a small noise of surprise. Strong hands were using something to dry off the rest of her hair so the wetness would no longer be touching the back of her neck and tops of her shoulders. She was almost too scared to move, but at the same time, she welcomed the touch more than anything else.
I don't understand, Ral.
His voice, as always, cut through Petra like shards sharper than glass could ever dream to be. Levi was intoxicating to her, but she never tried to let herself believe that she was too affected - it had gotten worse over these past few days, having so much alone time with him. It wasn't an aspect of their relationship that she had gotten accustomed to since before now, so it was only recently that these feelings had a chance to incubate. She was always aware that she admired him in more than just a few ways, but now she felt as though she could write a book about it.
Listening to him was difficult though, because she knew all of these things to be so painstakingly true. Petra knew that she was making things difficult and confusing for him, and she wasn't doing much better for her own self, either. It was like she would get a burst of confidence and courage and she would make a move, but soon after she would realize how idiotic she was being, and how childish her dreams were... And she would revert back to her soldierly self.
"I'm sorry." She said quietly, the flush on her face refusing to go away with having her Captain in such close proximity. She could feel the heat from his body temperature radiating off of him due to how close he was, mixing in with the heat from the stove - all and all, it was a nice and wonderful sensation that she didn't want to let go of. Petra gave a gentle, slightly saddened smile at Levi's last comment, giving a few, solemn nods. "You're probably right." The young woman gave a gentle sigh, finding that even though she was nervous, she was also... At ease. Like she didn't have to hide anything from the man standing behind her, like everything would be okay as long as she were near him.
"I don't mean to... I guess it's just me being childish. It's unrealistic of me to think things like that." There. She outright admitted it. That she was going back and forth between wanting to be in a relationship with her Captain and thinking it would be best if she simply stayed where she was. Petra was lost, confused and a complete love-struck imbecile. She didn't... Know how to fix that.